Grave Digging

Good morning!


I wrote a book and it’s getting published. This has all been in the works for some time now, but signing that contract and embarking on the editing journey with my editor really has pulled me down off my cloud and into reality…this is really happening!

But I was having so much fun up there. Writing all day everyday, high on coffee by day, wine at night. It was paradise. When I landed an agent, and then a publisher, I cried happy tears for days. My dream had come true! I’m going to be an actual writer. Like, a real one. I’m going to see my book printed on paper and on bookshelves! The clouds were now laced with glitter and happiness. Aarggh! Life is so fun!


The hard work sets in. Most people would think writing a book is the hard part. I spend my life watching documentaries on authors and their writing process and it’s quite common to hear that writing the manuscript isn’t even that fun for them! Writing a book was the best, most interesting, sometimes confronting experience of my life. Okay, maybe not the most confronting. I bury bodies for a living, but it’s definitely been a great time. So that’s how I know I truly am a writer. It’s where I’m meant to be, at my computer writing stories. Heck, I have a drawer full of stories I wrote when I was a kid, and mum has a photo album at home which isn’t brimming with photos – instead, every page of the album is plastered with stories that were published in school magazines and newspapers. Writing is fun!

So here I am, skipping about, sipping lattes and wearing red lipstick on my smile just because, and then my wonderful agent emails me. She loves the quotes I have used in my manuscript. Like, really likes them. The quotes I have used mean a lot to me and really help bring to life parts of the story. Buuut, in this email, I am informed I do need permission to use all of these wonderful excerpts, which I kind of already knew, but I would approach that hurdle when I came to it. That hurdle, ladies and gents, is here and it’s very tall. I’m a short ass. I have some big jumps ahead of me because half of the quotes I have used in my book come from the mouths of people…who are dead.

So now I must embark on a journey of investigating where the quote was first published, get clearance letters signed and my publisher has to credit this use. And then there are fees payable and oh my! My day is going to be digging, digging, digging like a grave digger. Literally. I wish I could go and find the deceased heroes who said these wonderful things and ask their permission! (Insert a huge whining wail here). I would rather dig for bodies than this stuff.

But, I’m going to stay optimistic. Who knows what I will find? Someone bring me coffee.




Friends and Pasta sauce

I twirled al dente fettucine on the fine silverware and my tongue had its own kind of orgasm as the flavour danced about in my mouth.

I had one woman to thank for this incredible meal.

I had stumbled across a vibrant blog on social media during a trip to one of my favourite cities. On her blog she recommends some fantastic restaurants and cafes to visit while in town as well some stylish posts on fashion. I was hooked. I could not get enough of this blonde bombshell with huge knowledge on the food and wine biz.

If only I could be as cool as her! I could pretend all I wanted, but this girl had serious sass! I messaged her and before too long we had arranged to meet the next time I was in town. But, in the meantime…

Tonight, my  sister rang me a little disheartened. On a spiritual journey and embracing yoga and fitness, she has delved into this phase of her life whole heartedly. Even her young children are embracing this new way of life. It’s truly inspirational. Anyhow, tonight, as I applied my makeup ready to paint the town red in my heels, I had her on loud speaker as I swept shimmer across my eyelids.

‘My post was reported,’ she said sadly. I could hear her pouring a cup of tea. ‘The post wasn’t of any bad nature at all. It was just me in a sports top doing yoga,’ she sniffled. Had she been crying? Here was this beautiful young woman enriching her life and some trolls out there had the audacity to try and bring her down. An empath, this negativity effected her. Sweeping highlighter across my cheekbones and swigging my extra shot coffee, I tried to cheer her up with my best-I’ve-got-your-back-big sister voice.

‘Do NOT let anyone stop you from inspiring others!’ I lectured, reaching for the lipstick. ‘If you stop posting just because of one bully, you never know how many others are missing out! Please, don’t let this stop you! You’re doing amazing and so many of your followers look up to you!’

‘Yeah,’ she sighed. ‘I’m tired. I’m going to go to bed.’

As a protective older sibling I naturally felt upset.

Before I headed out the door, I had some time to spare and opened my own messages. I had a message from one of my favourite bloggers. The sassy Queen from my favourite city! My heart grew like a flower as I read her beautiful words. This stunning woman who spent her days ice skating with friends and eating at the coolest places, shared with me another side to her- a secret blog that fed her soul. Death had touched her life dramatically and this outlet helped her heal and spread the word to others how you can come out at the other side of grief. A death maiden, I was dazzled and spent the next hour reading some of the most beautiful blog posts I’ve ever read. I was humbled this blogger felt she could share this with me but it also taught me something else.

IMG_6816 You just never know the suffering someone can be going through behind that shining smile. The clothes may be stylish, the friends may be abundant, but never think for one minute that they do not have another side. A spiritual side. A painful journey perhaps. It also reminded me that you should never stop reaching out to others with your passion, even if haters try and tear you down. My sister had only ever intended to spread love and inspiration, not to offend. She has a killer body and whoever reported her is clearly just jealous. And, then there are times I am exhausted and I would prefer to sleep than take that 2AM death call, share experiences on my blog or continue writing my book. But, I’m so glad I never stopped because this city blogger reached out to me! Little old me! I really cannot wait to meet with her over a huge glass of wine and pasta! But now, not only will we be discussing the city hot spots, we can discuss the spiritual world. Death. Life. The GUTS of this universe. This woman truly is remarkable and an inspiration. You really need to follow her.

I heard this quote somewhere, cheesy but it stuck with me. It went along the lines of ‘Don’t ever frown because you never know who could be falling in love with your smile.’

Something like that.

Don’t ever stop doing what you’re doing because you never know who you may be helping!

Keep sharing your light, love and passions and you and others will prosper!


You can follow Jessie’s yoga journey @jesskm1012

Follow Deb’s amazing spirit journey and her delightful chic city blog


Keep Shining baby girl xo

Look at you!



People ask: ‘Why Heels and Hearses?’

We can thank TV for the misconceptions of the death care industry – the mortuary often in dark basements with a greying man and a hunchback working in dim, flickering light. Warts on long noses mixing body parts in jars of bubbling liquid, hearse drivers resting their bellies on the steering wheels and ghoulish late night grave diggers.


The death care industry is nothing like this image many have created in their minds (okay, SOME hearse drivers have beer bellies), but the majority of us are young, fit and go to the beach on weekends. We have bright and fun hobbies and fantastic family and friends. I came up with Heels and Hearses to show you it’s not all gloomy cemeteries and blood splattered mortuary floors.

I love heels, fashion and combining my two passions – shoes and death care!

I looove driving the hearse, and often giggle to myself when guys gawk at the lights as if to say; ‘What is SHE doing driving a hearse?’

The funeral industry is alive (pun not intended) with bubbly young men and women who genuinely love and care for your loved one once they have taken their final breath. We live to serve you and ensure the deceased are well cared for, arriving at the cemetery or crematory safe and sound. It shouldn’t matter what we look like.

Young, blonde (except for in this picture, but I posted this pink monstrosity to make a point) and busty, I have often been victim to unusual glances by the public and even in the workplace by the older female funeral directors. They do not take me seriously and often ask; ‘Why are you working in a funeral home? Look at you!’

Look at me?

Why does my appearance matter when I am polishing a coffin or brushing a deceased’s hair for the final time?

It’s time young funeral professionals were celebrated! Glossy lips, cute heels and all!